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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Phoenix Rising's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, September 13th, 2003
3:26 am
My new religion is written in the song
Wednesday, I went to the Hanson concert at the Showbox. That was one interesting day. Erin, Charles adn I waited outside the venue for 14hours. Though durring that time we did get to meet some great people. We ened up in the front row on the left side of the stage, just in front of Zac's drums. I just can't believe that in the pastweek I've been at the very front for 3 different shows. I'm very proud of that.

I have a newfound respect for Hanson, especially Zac. The boy would tune his drum at a rest in the middle of a song, and then come back in perfectly. I have never seen a drummer do that. That is so cool.

After the show I was admiring the sound board in the back while waiting in line for the Merchandise table, and right after mentioning that I would prefer a Mackie board. The sound guy gave me his special setlist. He was looking right at me as I made the Mackie comment and just gave it too me. Their sound guy kicks lots of booty.

While I know many of you are groaning about my enjoyment of this band/show...I highly recomend going to a show if you ever get a chance. Just sit in teh back and enjoy, they are true performers and obviously love what they are doing. That is the only way to really earn my respect as a musician.

Besides the concert, one of the other really interestig things that happened that day was seeing seven police cars show up to arrest this one guy that had ben harrasign one of the girls all night. He happened to be a registered sexual predator, and the many cars arrived because he was resistign arrest, but it was still quite a spectacle for 7am in downtown Seattle.

I think that's all I can really say for now. I have so much i wantot write about, but I'm falling asleep here as is. I'll write more tomorrow while I have the day off.

Current Mood: sleepy
Monday, September 8th, 2003
12:03 pm
I had a dream this morning that I was calling Ani Diffranco on my cell phone, and just as someone picked up I hung up. The next think i knew my phone was waking me up ringing. weird...

I Am

Which tarot card are you?

Spiritual enlightenment, inner illumination, hidden power. Link between seen and unseen. Balance of positive and negative forces. Receptivity. Unseen guidance.
A young woman sits on a throne holding a scroll labeled "Tora" meaning "law." On her breast is the sign of the meeting of heaven and earth, the Maltese cross. Her crown is the full orb supported by horns, the crown ofthe Mother Goddess Isis, who rules all things changeable, shown by the moon at her feet. Her power, upon which her throne rests, derives from the creative principle of duality, shown by the two pillars of light and darkness. To those who know and love her she dispenses the sweet fruit of the world itself, symbolized by the pomegranites.

Sweet Dreams
"Sweet Dreams" (by Eurythmics)
Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused

Which 80's Song Fits You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Sunday, September 7th, 2003
1:00 pm
classes start on the 22nd... I must stock up on caffinated shit by then, or else I'll pass out while drivign to and from school (that is if I still have a car by then)

I hate you emmissions. I know my car won't pass this year. And if it happens to pass, there is some deity out there that really loves me.

Yay to the hour long nap I just took.

I feel very happy when I hear Maynard Keenan singing a song about his genitalia...

Current Mood: sleepy
2:02 am

I know the pieces fit cuz I watched them fall away
Mildewed and smoldering. Fundamental differing.
Pure intention juxtaposed will set two lovers souls in motion
Disintegrating as it goes testing our communication
The light that fueled our fire then has burned a hole between us so
We cannot see to reach an end crippling our communication.

I know the pieces fit cuz I watched them tumble down
No fault, none to blame it doesn't mean I don't desire to
Point the finger, blame the other, watch the temple topple over.
To bring the pieces back together, rediscover communication

The poetry that comes from the squaring off between,
And the circling is worth it.
Finding beauty in the dissonance.

There was a time that the pieces fit, but I watched them fall away.
Mildewed and smoldering, strangled by our coveting
I've done the math enough to know the dangers of our second guessing
Doomed to crumble unless we grow, and strengthen our communication.

Cold silence has a tendency to atrophy any
Sense of compassion
Between supposed lovers/brothers
1:54 am
My mom's best friend has cancer. Kidney cancer that has moved to her spine. She finds out this week if it's moved to her lungs. I really hope it hasn't. Sue is such a great person. I don't want anything to happen to her.

I dont' want to dwell on this, but I feel like I should cause my mom is so worried about her. I'm worried about her. Sue's a part of my family. I wish I knew how to talk to my mom about it. I know she needs lots of hugs and support, as does Sue...


I hate feeling helpless.

Current Mood: aggravated
Saturday, September 6th, 2003
2:21 pm
Why is it every time I become excited about my life, I lose someone in my life. I'm really getting tired of this useless cycle.

Oh well, I guess Hanson was right.

You have so many Relationships in this life
Only one or two will last
YOu're going through all this pain and strife
Then your turn your back and thy're gone so fast
And tehy're gons so fast
So hold on to the ones who really care
In the end they'll be ther only ones there...

Yes, I know I have a weakness for some really odd blends of music. Speaking of which, I got ths great Cd while at Bumbershoot. This really beautiful drummer guy from Oregon was busking, and you cuould get his CD for $5 so I was nice and bought it. It's a fucking awesome cd. I love it..

This morning I got tickets to see Evanescence again, at the Moore Theatre. I'm escited, that means I will now have seen them about a many times as John (technically more if you count the three accoustic songs they did at teh meet ang greet I went to at Tower).

Now to my rant on music stores.

I'm having issues with the fact that the larger stores carry shit loads of music of absolutely no substance, but they only have two Tool albums, one Smashing Pumpkins one and so on with many many other great bands/musicians. Can we start giving some love to the peopel in the world that are truely talented at what they do? I also noticed a similar problem in the clasical section. They had sections for Mozart, Bach, Shopin, Shumman, Debussy, but nothing for Listz, There was no love for Franz Listz, and now thinking back on it, I also think there wasnt' a section for Beethoven, how can those two be left out?...Beethoven was the prominent composer to lead the way into the Romantic period (so it's said) he was the crossover from the classical period to the romantic one... then there's Listz one of teh first musical heart throbs, but also a very prominent composer of the Romantic period...he woudl be up there with Debussy...how can tehy leave tehm out?

Ok, end of rant...

Current Mood: artistic
12:06 am
I miss video games...
Hehehehe....I got to spend a few hours on Bangor today. I like it there. I get a much better vibe there than I did on Ft. Lewis. Maybe it's cause it doesn't really look too much like a military base (minus the secured gates and random people in uniform). Maybe it's cause everythign's just kinda newer and it tends to look a bit more like a small city.


I went up to Bremerton to visit Aaron, and ended up going with him to get appartment/house listings for the area. After that, we got lunch with a couple of his friend's from work and then ended up back at Bangor visiting another one of his friend's from work. There we all sat around for a fwe hours watched a movie and then played around with video games. Mike on his computer, Aaron on the playstation, and me on Aaron's Gameboy (yes I was playing games, what a scary thought).

I think I'm being pulled into being more of a nerd... John should love that. He's only been able to accomplish just so much from St. Louis.

Migrain meds = tiredness... goodnight

Current Mood: amused
Tuesday, September 2nd, 2003
12:09 pm
i just realized i forgot to make not of the really annoying chick durring Evanescence that got jizzed on by some random guy. She freaked and had to be pulled from the front (yay)

ok that is that..

My throat hurts still... I should go make some tea
4:18 am
My Details

Opening DayCollapse )

Side Note I know I kept talking about how I wanted to see Maktub, and I still do. I just didn't want to separate the group and Steph was all about Modest Mouse. Besides, I should have many more chances to see Maktub in the future (yay to local bands).

lots and lots of crazinessCollapse )

Day of WaitingCollapse )

Just one show pleaseCollapse )

Somehow between last night and right now, I have used up an entire tank of gas... I'm still trying to figure out how. there was the drive home from Seattle last night, the derive to and from Seattle today. and teh ride to and from Olympia (from Tacoma). That doens't really seem like that was enough driving to kill my tank. I use to be able to make it from Shoreline to Port Orchard and sometime back to Tacoma and only have to fill up every three days.... maybe I'm doing the math wrong. I'm not sure. If anyone can help me go right on ahead

The Shows Isaw this weekend
  • Pizzazz!

  • Modest Mouse

  • Saturday
  • Celebrity Dream Date

  • Macy Gray

  • Mary Lou Lord

  • Boom Bap Project

  • Aesop Rock & Murs

  • The Dandy Warhols

  • Sunday
  • Black Eyed Peas

  • De La Soul

  • Cold

  • Evanescence

  • Monday
  • Mary Lou Lord

  • Wilco

  • REM

I should try and sleep...

Current Mood: calm
Monday, September 1st, 2003
12:15 pm
So much to say about the last two days, but alas...I'm off to Seattle once again!

Current Mood: crazy
Saturday, August 30th, 2003
2:57 am
Yeah, so I almost died today.
While driving to Seattle this morning with Steph. NOt too far from the West Seattle Bridge Exit, some bitch in a red explorer decides she needs to change lanes and not look to see if someone els is there. So being as I drive a Geo Metro, I instinctively start to try and move away from the SUV that would win. As I do that I look tto my left an dsee another car coming on that side, but they see my predicament and move over so they are as close to the median as possible (seeing as tehy were in the far right lane). So basically for longer than I would like to have happen, I was riding on the line trying to avoid a lorg accident from happening on I5. So once the car on the left passes me and I can get over and my car recovers from me hitting my brakes (again thank you for the alert drivers to as well slowed down at the same fucking time I did), Igo into the left lane and when I finally pass the suv and have my sloght fit, the woman looks at me like she's completely oblivious having almost cause a 3 car pile up (at least).

I know I drive a go-kart but geeze, you'd think people would be smart enough to notice them...

I've been so horrible with updatign recently...I feel so very bad. about that. Besides I have a few stories I keep sayign I need to tell and never have. but I guess that's just me being lazy, and I have been feeling that way this past week or so. Oh well..

The Great Cat CaperCollapse )

My finger still looks nasty, but it doesn't really hurt anymore (only when I smack it at work while wrpping pizzas in a rush.

Since then nothing really as exciting has happened. Though, I have started hanging out with Heidi, which is kinda weird, sicne I hadn't socalized with her since we were in elementary school. Now, I'm crashing at her motel this weeked for the rest of Bumbershoot (it's just too weird)

2 swf seek sbf for good clean fun and raunchy sex talkCollapse )

And now today. I had a great time at Bumbershoot, though I did give up on seeing Maktub to see Modest Mouse instead. maktub is a local band, I know I'll have a chance to see them elsewhere around here. Modest Mouse was ok... I still think they should never play in arena setting like Bumbershoot is. They're just better in a club environment.

The Space Needle has become a part of a muscal instrumetn called The Space Harp. It's huge and weird and cool andoh my god I want it.

We went to The Stranger's Talent Show. I really thing Steph should enter next year and should definately do one of her funny songs...or maybe do one of her hip hop medley's... She does a kick ass acoustic version of Rapper's Delight. I still thingk the "four fingers and a hotdog bun" man should have won the competition.

Yay to Heidi for buying us dinner afterwards at the Chinese Place in teh International District.

Macy Gray
Celebrity Dating Game
Mary Lou Lord
Dj Eva
The Dandy Warhols

I really should get some sleep...I have to be up in five hours to pick everyone up.

Current Mood: artistic
Thursday, August 28th, 2003
11:15 pm
I haven't felt this horribl ein a long time

I have a migraine that *barely* tolerable, a really bad sore throat that got worse because it was a busy fucking day at work (fuck you Candy for wanting an unreasonably high labor percentage). I'm cold, and have an overal weakness through my body.

I shouldnot have gone to work today... Fuck me for having a good work ethic.

Bumbershoot starts tomorrow though...
Throughout the day - raondom outings to the "what's Next" stage
3pm - Meet up with Heidi
8:45 - 10:15pm - Maktub at the Bumbrella Stage

*runs to the bathroom and dry heaves*

i know there's more but i can't think of it now...

I'm going to bed

Current Mood: sick
Wednesday, August 27th, 2003
7:04 pm
So much better than the silverfairae one....

<td bgcolor="#000000">Who will play you:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">Philip Seymour Hoffman </td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Who will play your love interest:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">Johnny Depp </td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Weeks you will stay in the box office:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">8</td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Song that will play during your love scene:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">Space - Female of the Species </td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Song that will play during your death:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">Ozzy Osbourne - See You On the Other Side</td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Your name:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA"></td></tr>
Your Life: The Movie by mintyduck
Created with quill18's MemeGen!
Saturday, August 23rd, 2003
3:26 pm
unfortunately until this pain in my finger subsides...I cannot type much, cause I'm very much slowed down with a smashed index finger.

Current Mood: annoyed
2:11 am
I have so much to say, but my finger hurts so bad that I can't type... so I guess it's a night of lyrics...

--A Perfect ircle

metaphor for a missing moment
pull me into your perfect circle
one womb
one shape
one result
liberate this will to release us all
gotta cut away clear away slip away and sever
this umbilical residue keeping me from killing you
and from pulling you down with me
here i can almost hear you scream
give me one more medicated peaceful moment
give me one more medicated peaceful moment
and i don't want to feel this
overwhelming hostility
i don't want to feel this overwhelming hostility
gotta cut away clear away slip away and sever this umbilical residue
gotta cut away clear away slip away and sever this umbilical residue
keeping me from killing you
slip away and sever this
keeping me from killing you

Current Mood: sick
Thursday, August 21st, 2003
2:50 am
Everyone should go buy THIS BOOK

Open Mic was great, though the highschoolers are slowly taking over. B.J. showed up with the master copy of Steph's CD which should be finished in a couple of weeks pending song selections. He stuck around for ahile and I finally got to have a conversation wiht the boy. I've known who he was since I was a freshman at Stadium, but I had never actually had a full conversation with him. We ended up talking music and recording equipent. I asked him about what he used to record Steph (equipment, mic placement, etc...). It was really nice to be able to sit and talk engineering wiht someone and not have to explain things. Very refreshing.

I miss being in the studio... I miss being in the photo lab... I think i just miss spending hours in dark rooms with no walls

I've made a decision to buy a copy of Nicole's Cd beofore Terry moves to Minesota 9since I think Nicole is going with her). On top of losing a great sound engineer, we will also be losing one hell of a musician

enter at your own risk...Collapse )

After open mic I spent a a couple hours at Denny's with Steph, Fabian and, Heidi. Now, I haven't really talked to Heidi in years. Everyonce in awhile she shows up at Open mic and we say hi and update eachother on our families, but tonight, the frou of us sat reading through that sex book. It's the most interesting things ever.

Oh and for those that may be interested in knowing this... As of August. 17th... I have become vegitarian.

I believe that is all for now..

Current Mood: horny
Wednesday, August 20th, 2003
4:40 pm
A friend of mine just offered to buy me a ticket for Lollapalooza... and I can't accept it because I have to work that day now. I swear I have the worst luck ever right now.

Current Mood: aggravated
Tuesday, August 19th, 2003
3:46 am
The wonderful David had his going away party today. He leaves us for Austria for 4 months. I'm so jealous of that boy, I love him dearly, the best musican I have ever known...but I'm just so jealous. I've never been to Europe and this is his 3rd time there. Plus, he gets to see Radiohead in London, on his birthday...My musical genius is leaving me in the country all alone to take care of Steph....Oh dear...

The party was fun, and after my slightly stressfull afternoon, was very much appreciated. Got to see Danny again, adn it's definately good to see his long ass rats nest of hair... I missed that back at Stadium his senior year. Chad and Skunky were there, as well as Jamie, Steph, Michaela, Collin, and of course... Luke. Luke has some of the best stories, and is also a "3rd level, blackbelt negro-in-training" (according to Steph, who has all the say in that)...hehehe... Danny soent most of the night trying to get the title of having 'negro tendancies" but it wasn't working. I swear, he reminded me of Owen in so many ways.

Once we all kinda left the house, Steph and I headed over to Denny's to chill a few more hours, and I almost killed my car... as a result, my car decided to stall out while at the turn into teh culdesacks. I then coased around all the turns and my car finally stopped moving as I pulled up to the little parking stip just infront of my house. I kick so much ass right now. I just hope it starts tomorrow afternoon when I go get Emma from the vet. GO ME!

All this was a much needed distraction from my thoughts of the afternoon. I'm very pleased about that. distrations are always good, plus I got a few hugs from Steph when I told her what I did today. I defninately need lots of hugs right now.

If someone could tell me where my black running tank is it would be very much appreciated... I really do miss it, it ws my favorite of all my cleavage tanks and actaully did it's job when I was running.... I don't like having to use an old racing suit while running now. I feel like a sausage when I wear it.

hmmmmm....Collapse )

I dont' work again till Thursday at 4pm... what do I do with my time until then?..... Anyone?

Current Mood: calm
Monday, August 18th, 2003
6:55 pm
5:31 pm
I just want to get rid of the guilt I feel
I accomplished a lot today, and ended up driving up the penninsula as a result. Took that cat to the vet (grr), took the tape of Gammie (my great-grandmother) to my grandparents in Gig Harbor so they can find out where she was born. Next, I ate lunchi n Port Orchard and tried to remain calm and non-emotional, but unfortunately I failed miserably. I then went back to Gig harbor and stopped to make an appointemnt to get my ahir colored again. I love having an aunt that's a stylist. On the way home I was lucky enough to deal with traffic leaving Gig Harbor...joy... I swear if there's any sor tof blessing about all this it's not really havign to deal with bridge traffic while the new one is being built, since people are moronic enough to slow dwn to 25-30 MPH so they can look over the side and see what's going on.

Read the signs people! It says, KEEP UP SPEEDS WHILE CROSSING BRIDGE... Is that really all that hard to do?

After all that frustration, I ended up in downtown Tacoma, at The Camera Shop. Got my camera fixed and it was free cause apparently it wasn't anything bad (yay!)

In all this diving today, I've done my fair share of crying, and I was able to talk to Heather about it, a little bit. The problem is, she's too distracted, and stressed out enough as it is. I don't want to add to her stress...she's pregnant, she doesn't need any more stress. It's bad enough that my step-nephew may be a convicted sex-offender. They've had to deal wth all the court stuff with that, and then that leads to money stress that I know they have.

Ok...enough with the rambling for now...I feel like I'm going no where..maybe I'll be able to fix this when my thoughts are more clear.

Current Mood: discontent
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